Don't Mess With Kong!

Peter Jackson should be sprayed with female pheromones and locked in a cage with a couple of pissed off silverbacks for making an unwatchable "King Kong." I tried. I really tried to give it a chance. I sat through Jack Black's mugging. I admired Adrian Brody's magnificent honker from several angles while I was bored. (Come on, you have to admit that if you put him in a cope and miter or surcote and chainmail, he'd look like he'd stepped off the west front of a gothic cathedral.) I tried to laugh at the Pamplona-like Running Of The Brontos. I had to turn it off while they were STILL farting around on Skull Island getting eaten by giant leeches.

Look at this. Is he not exquisite? I took this with a point and shoot digital from 25 yards away at the SF Zoo! He is not a pig eyed, rubber skinned mangeball. But then, I didn't have Jackson's production budget.