Funniest things read today (CONSOLIDATED)

First prize: The flyer I found in my mailbox from Fletcher Jones Motorcars of Fremont.

( Picture me in a Porsche with a roof rack )

Second prize:

"The Almighty Cow
 The Silent Killing Ninja
 The Burger is Served"
 
A stealthy search turned up the source: http://ninjaburger.com/fun/creativity/haiku.shtml

Third prize: Blogspot Quiz on Anger

( Anger quiz )

Honorable mention: Suspicious sweepstakes email purporting to be from MTV.
Sure, I'd love $500,000, but how come when I go to the MTV International Website I cannot find ANY mention of this sweepstakes?  Of course the MTV websites don't appear to have any email contact links, but I did find a mailing address for their main office in New York. I do believe I shall print out the email and send it to the attention of their legal department. If this is a scam, they should be notified so they can do what they need to at their end. If it is legit, I should be directed to claim my prize in a more secure fashion.

( Text of suspicious email )

Shadows on flowers.....

Both of these were written as part of a tanka chain with other members of  the Outlands Bardic Yahoo Group. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/outlands-bardic/message/11610 and following messages if you're interested in seeing the whole sequence.

A silent garden
Lies in ruin, bloom trampled
By his heedless feet.
Thoughtless cruelty burdens
Her sleeves with a thousand griefs.

The pale, graceful arc
Of a waning moon bows low
In the western sky.
Shadow shapes wait for the dawn
To reveal their flower selves.