A polite rebuttal on the subject of female empowerment

[gurdymonkey]

To barone_antonio 's post of this evening.

You are too kind sir. Truly.

I have no problems owning up to the fact that I am a bitch. It took years of practice, of resisting my natural inclination to be pathologically shy and quiet, decades of developing a backbone of titanium alloy. I have reached an age where I need not suffer fools lightly. I say what I mean, I mean what I say, and I never, EVER apologize unless I mean that too. If that makes me a cast-iron pain in the ass, so be it. Anybody who does not like that and accept me for who I am can step out of my way, thank you.

Gaius called me a bitch once, during some argument I don't even remember. I recall retorting something to the effect of "What, the howling wasn't your first clue?" (Which is probably why the argument went out the window and I can't even remember what it was about.)

If you place me on a pedestal, I'm gonna jump right off it, I swear it. It's boringly distant up there, and drafty, and people just try to peer up one's skirt under the pretense of admiring one.

Ladies, on three.

One.

Two.

ARRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

Comments

Joining the Chorus

[shalmestere.livejournal.com]

ARRROOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

[la-peregrina.livejournal.com]

:::with back to the wall::: yip-yip-YAAARRROOOOOOOOOO!

[sarcasm-hime.livejournal.com]

I keep this icon for just such occasions.

[sengokudaimyo.livejournal.com]

Just want to say -- this icon is six kinds of awesome.

[la-peregrina.livejournal.com]

So is the user name.

[sengokudaimyo.livejournal.com]

Oh, hell yeah. :)

[mamapduck.livejournal.com]

That icon rocks. All it needs is Sparkle motion!

[barone-antonio.livejournal.com]

My point is this: women can be their own person without being a bitch and I have contempt for those who would seek to identify a strong woman as a bitch because of their strength. I don't apologize for my post as it was written to support several individuals in my life who I sincerely care about. Sorry... you can claim it if you really must... but let me make the following clear about the following strong willed women:

--my protege is not a bitch.

--my lady is not a bitch.

--my daughter is not a bitch.

--my grandmother was not a bitch.

--my mother was not a bitch.

Quite frankly, I don't think a woman needs to be a bitch to be an individual, outspoken, opinionated, intelligent or her own person... and no, these five individuals in my life are not on pedestals and they are not plaster saints... they are (or were) women of flesh and blood ... and yet, even in the face of a bad day, they are not, nor should they be thought of as bitches.

If you, or anyone else wishes to wear the mantle of bitch... get on with your bad self... it's a free country... you get to disagree with me, ridicule me, mock me, say whatever you want (absent actionable defamation of character) and I have no interest in convincing you otherwise. As for your disdain for my post, all I can say is this... don't feel compelled to read it if it causes you displeasure.

Well, woof!

[gurdymonkey.livejournal.com]

Disdain? Mockery? This is what I get simply for presenting an opposing point of view?

As indicated...

[barone-antonio.livejournal.com]

...get on with your bad self....

[la-peregrina.livejournal.com]

I cannot speak for anyone else: On another level, IMHO, I am simply agreeing with George Carlin: Words have only as much power and meaning as we choose to give them, and by themselves are only sounds. I don't care what I am called when the fan's been hit and the feces starts flying.

In retrospect, I find it interesting that my ex would call me a bitch when I had the nerve to stand up to him, and sometimes I paid for that with a bruise. So in that context, if my leaving my former spouse made me a bitch then, and if phone calls to the insurance company and to medical billing departments to dispute claim denials on behalf of my present husband fighting lymphoma make me a bitch now, give me a tail and I'll wag it. When my back is to the wall, this chihuahua finds her bark. :-)

I respectfully dissent.

[barone-antonio.livejournal.com]

Certain words have a meaning unto themselves, e.g. the derogatory word beginning with "n" directed at African Americans... and no, I don't wish to argue whether "bitch" is one of those words. In my opinion, while I agree in part when considering the seven words one cannot say on television, George Carlin's comments on the power of words does not pertain to derogatory words regarding race, creed, ancestry, gender, or sexual orientation.

As indicated previously, I directed my original comment of support towards certain friends (and one family member). I also do not believe that a strong woman needs to "be a bitch" to be a strong woman nor is she a "bitch" for being a strong woman.

In some twenty-two years serving as a prosecuting attorney, I have prosecuted domestic violence, rape and molestation... some eight years exclusively prosecuting sexual assault and two years exclusively prosecuting domestic violence... and with this experience, I have raised my very feminine, fashion conscious daughter to stand up for herself and be her own person.

In terms of your words "...if my leaving my former spouse made me a bitch then, and if phone calls to the insurance company and to medical billing departments to dispute claim denials on behalf of my present husband fighting lymphoma make me a bitch now, give me a tail and I'll wag it..." I heard a friend of mine say something like that... and it hurt me inside to think that this very wonderful, warm, intelligent and loving woman had to feel this way... that she had to "dig-in" and say "if you want to call me a bitch for standing up to you, then I'm a bitch." Now it's clear that a person was calling my friend a "bitch" behind her back, but I urged her to resist this thought that she had to be a "bitch" to fight back. She sent me something in an email and to underscore the point... I rewrote it and added to it. I stand by my original words.

Re: I respectfully dissent.

[la-peregrina.livejournal.com]

That, sir, is your privilege and right.

I may not agree with what you say, but I'll defend to the death your right to say it.--Voltaire

[barone-antonio.livejournal.com]

Best wishes on your husband's battle.

[la-peregrina.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

Noisemaking in harmony 8)

[minstrlmummr.livejournal.com]

ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAARRRRRRR!!!!!!!

Re: Noisemaking in harmony 8)

[la-peregrina.livejournal.com]

I like this! :-)

[laurensa.livejournal.com]

Aroooo...

When Greg calls me a bitch (always in teasing, never in argument), I always have the same response. "Yes, and you knew that when you married me."

[danabren.livejournal.com]

barOOOOOOOO!

[mamapduck.livejournal.com]

ARRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!

(And my bad self thinks your bad self is dead on.)